HOUSE

This is the second night in a row I have not been able to sleep. I took pain killers hoping I would acquire some form of drowsiness that would eventually lead to slumber deep.

.Unfortunately that has not happened and here I am. I don’t feel tired or anything but I know I should be in bed. There nothing to do at this hour, or should I say there is nothing that I want to do at this hour.

Though my body has voltages of restlessness bolting up and down, I long for sleep. On more than one occasion I have had the urge to creep, out the house and listen to the calls of the night. I don’t know what frightens me more, the thought of exploring the unknown or the rather fickle state I am in.

Perhaps, this is what I was destined for, to overcome this bane. Is it a bane, or is my reluctance to give in to the calling completely that makes is seem so.

All I know is I am still in control and I don’t know how much of that control I will still have after I have explored the unknown. After I have drank from the wells of the night, ate of the flesh of this unfamiliarity and got pleasured by the surreal nature of it all.

I am alone in this house and loneliness has been but a silent companion. I harbour the scores I have not settled with the ones who left me to my own devices, uneducated.

They left me only to feel my way out this maize, and wander for all my days, the earth with the knowledge that, I should make best friends with myself, because people like me can only be known by people like me. With that said I will be known by them, but them I will never know.

Ceaser Mata